The Queen's a Malefactor, M'lord
by Eevee9279
Summary: For hundreds of past years, The Clocks have chosen countless leaders of different social classes to rule the four different kingdoms: Hearts, Diamonds, Spades, and Clubs. The Spades Kingdom was lucky, this time around: their King was royalty already; he was familiar with it all. However, the Queen had been missing - until his Jack informed him he wasn't.
1. Chapter 1

When His Highness awoke, he was cold.

It wasn't that his bed was insufficient. In fact, it was quite the opposite. It was large and elaborate, fit for none but a king. Except, perhaps, a king and his queen.

As comfortable as the bed was, it was meant for two. Unfortunately, the newly crowned King of Spades was alone.

Since his coronation the previous month, the King Alfred had been sending soldiers all over his kingdom in search of the one chosen to rule by his side. Thankfully, Spades and Diamonds were at peace, unlike usual, so soldiers from all corners of the kingdom were available to aid the search.

All four kingdoms each held three magical clocks, gifts from the mysterious Jokers several centuries in the past. The clocks chose the people from the kingdom who were most fit to rule in the three highest positions; king, queen, and jack. Social class didn't matter to the clocks. All that mattered was their ability to guide the people.

When the former King of Spades had died, a little over a month previous, the citizens were terrified. Though they knew their next king would be destined for the position, nothing could guarantee that he would be familiar with the proper way to conduct oneself in royal courts.

Thankfully, the kingdom needn't have worried, because the clocks identified the nineteen-year-old, noble born, Alfred Frederick Jones as the next King of Spades. Being of noble blood, Alfred was already perfectly familiar with protocol and etiquette. However, the chosen queen had yet to be found.

Alfred carried out his duties to the best of his ability, but was painfully aware of the loneliness he experienced. He tried to keep his mind off it, as his Jack, Yao Wang, had advised, but every morning, Alfred was reminded of their lack of success by the the lack of a warm body next to him.

He slowly dragged himself out of bed and attempted to mentally prepare himself for the day's trials. Thankfully, problems were few and far between with the beautiful planting season that they had just experienced. Alfred quietly chuckled to himself as he thought of the harsh, unforgiving winter that was destroying the crops of the kingdom of Clubs. Though he didn't mean to be cruel, King Ivan of Clubs had not left the best impression when he met Alfred at the recent coronation.

Yanking his thoughts to a different train of thought, Alfred attempted to flatten his hair with a varying degree of success. When all but one stubborn strand had begun to obey gravity, Alfred dressed and ate breakfast brought by servants, thinking of anything but the empty space to his right.

THIS IS A LINE BREAK. HIS NAME IS ROBERT.

This is my first Hetalia fanfic, and I'm relatively proud of it. Please review!

Disclaimer: I am female. I do not speak Japanese. Therefore, I am probably not Hidekaz Himaruya.


	2. Chapter 2

Later that morning, Alfred sat on his throne listening to the problems brought to him by his citizens, struggling for solutions. When he heard the familiar creaking of the door to his left, he looked to see Jack Yao Wang. Seeing the look on his face, Alfred quickly excused himself and followed the Jack out of the room, trying to hide his joy at being pulled from the difficult task of solving his people's problems.

Yao rushed down the hallway at a fast pace without a word of explanation. Alfred tried to think of what news the Jack could have.

As they walked into an empty meeting room, Yao took a seat and gestured for Alfred to do so as well. At the king's curious look, the Jack took a deep breath and cleared his throat.

Alfred mentally groaned, noting Yao's body language. Though they'd only worked together for a month, Alfred was familiar enough with the Jack to know that he would have to be patient to hear the news. Yao, though he was a marvelous story teller, was known for being very wordy and for leaving the story's point until the very end, as if it were a punchline to a joke. Alfred, however, quickly learned that the stories were rarely amusing.

Yao's words stirred Alfred from his musings, begin his tale by saying that, two days previous, several soldiers had been resting from searching for the queen in an old port town. As customers had begun flooding in, however, the clock they had held had begun quietly chiming. They'd quickly sobered and begun walking around the bar, realizing that the cause for the chiming was the presence of royalty. They were able to eliminate all but a few customers, and waited for those few to become inebriated enough that they wouldn't be suspicious of someone waving a clock in their face.

Alfred, who had been trying to patiently listen to the story, lost all self-control and demanded to know if his queen had been found.

Yao, startled, hesitated a moment, eyes darting around the room, as if searching for eavesdroppers. Then he quietly replied.

"Yes, your Highness. The queen has been found."

Alfred could hardly believe it. He wanted to meet this man. Destiny had chosen thIs man to be his queen, and who was he to defy destiny? He told the Jack as much, who shook his head.

"Please, you don't understand. This man, the Queen of Spades. He is Captain Arthur Kirkland. The most feared pirate in the Sea of Cards."

Alfred's smile, which previously threatened to split his face in half, vanished immediately. Obviously, his Jack was joking.

"You jest, Yao. Had I not known better, I would have thought you a Joker."

Yao denied vehemently, and tried to further convince the King of his truthfulness. As the normally calm Jack began losing his composure, Alfred seriously considered the idea of a pirate being his queen. He could think only of how ridiculous it was, but noted the look on Yao's face, which portrayed nothing but truth.

Alfred held up his hand, cutting off Yao's pleas mid-word, and spoke. "Where is he?"

Yao's face flashed to gratitude for a moment before it was wiped carefully blank. "The dungeons, your Highness. He is a criminal, after all."

Alfred, frozen in place, quietly said, "Take me to him." Yao nodded, training his eyes on the floor. He stood and left, Alfred following closely behind.

THIS IS THE FIRST LINE BREAK'S WIFE. HER NAME IS NANCY.

Here's chapter two. Not much to say, really.


	3. Chapter 3

Though Alfred had yet to see the dungeons during his reign, they were much like he had expected. Cold, dark, and smelly.

He was apalled by the dirt found everywhere, thinking only that the rightful Queen of Spades was being kept here against his will. He was struggling to grasp that the pirate was a criminal who deserved punishment.

As Alfred walked closely behind Yao, ignoring the snarls of caged prisoners, he began to internally panic. What was he to do? How could he really rule Spades with a man who had commited treason against that very kingdom?

As the two rulers reached the cell containing the infamous pirate, Alfred braced himself for confrontation. He heard Yao saying something into the darkness of the cell, but didn't process it through his already jumbled thoughts.

Suddenly, though, he saw a person moving in the darkness. Hearing a reply to whatever Yao had said, Alfred squinted, trying to make out his future queen. A passing guard noticed the dilemma and handed Alfred a lamp. Alfred muttered a detached thanks and and looked upon the imprisoned Captain Kirkland.

Chained to the back of the cell, the pirate recoiled from the light, obviously unused to it. After a moment, he squinted defiantly at the King of Spades. "So you're the king, eh? Bit young, aren't you? You're just a kid."

Alfred narrowed his eyes, but felt Yao's hand on his shoulder, silently advising him not to be petty. The young king understood, and looked once more upon the pirate.

Kirkland wore an amused expression, one eyebrow raised. Alfred noticed the very large size of them, but swallowed a cheeky remark, mentally reprimanding himself. It wouldn't do to immediately go about insulting his queen.

"Yes, I am young, but I was chosen to rule by the clocks. Same as you."

Kirkland's eyes widened for just a moment, quickly returning to their normal, cocky look. "You don't really want that. Just think. A famous pirate, on the throne? I don't think that's a good idea, and I know that you don't either." His voice was rough, marred by an odd accent from Northern Spades, combined with what was probably an excess of alcohol. To be expected from a pirate.

Alfred quickly retorted to Kirkland's jab. "You're right. I don't want you on the throne. You're a pirate, a thief, a murderer. Unfit for the throne." Arthur looked suspicious at the king's words until he continued. "Unfortunately, we have no choice. The clocks chose you. Your destiny is here, in this castle. You have been marked as the best suited for the throne. No matter how we feel about this, we must carry out the deed. We have no choice."

Alfred turned and began walking, leaving his Queen and Jack behind, dumbfounded. As he left, though, he said, "Yao. I want you to hire someone to teach the Captain how to carry out his duties as Queen. Coronation should within the month. I want him out of this cell and given clothing and a meal right away."

The Jack hesitantly agreed, and Alfred could hear the cell door opening behind him. As he walked back to the throne room to continue his duties, he couldn't keep a smile off his face. Though it may take some time, he had found his queen, and would no longer wake to a cold, empty bed.

THIS IS ROBERT'S AND NANCY'S CHILD. HIS NAME IS STEPHEN.

Well, there's the end of that. I hope you enjoyed!


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